Being alone!!!

At this point of time I am here at my room, just lying on the top of my bed; and thinking about many things! as usual I have my pen and paper in hand.
If there's one thing that I always do at this point of my life, nothing but writing!!!
I always express my feelings through writing, until sometimes, I run out of words to use.

I can't explain what this I am feeling right now is. It's a mixed emotion of regrets, worrying, sadness, pain, despair, and loneliness.

Life is unfair!!! Yes it is.... If only things is that easy.
Like a words that has been spoken out of your mouth, like how it's easy for men to swear the BULLSHIT, like how it easy to manipulate events in once own story,
and how it easy for a rainbow to vanish in a moment of time, without noticing by humans.

If I only have the power to control my life on how I want it to be, then it would be perfect!
I know you've wished it too, but we can’t!

As long as men can breathe, as long as men have pulses, as long as men have reflexes within this rotten system of things, it will never be perfect as we wished to!

Sometimes, I'd want to be asleep for ages rather than awake but full of sorrow in life.
These things slowly killing me! What a grief in life? Who could tell that beyond what my looks was, the way I acted, smiled, spoke, and giggled was being poison inside.

You may not understand me but its okay! You don't have to... but someday you will.
We all have struggles in life but maybe you perceive others problem just nothing compares to yours! But is it fair enough?
Sometimes, we tend to think those things in head. Am I right? Well, so as I.
I'll tell you why... first: because maybe you still not yet experiencing the same problem as I am having. Second: maybe you already overcome it, once you overcome that kinda problem you may thought it is easy because you passed the challenge.
Either of those two is the reason... definitely it is.
and the reason for that reason is that, sometimes, without realizing, We are a close minded and self centered being that we seems to act and think like we owned the hardest problem to the extreme and we feels like we're carrying the whole Earth as it is!

Well, Life always has its sweetest pick in it and accompanied by bitterness! We can’t do anything but to wait and see... and be faithful!!!!